When October Feels Like One Long Monday: Stress, Silence, and the Stories Men Carry
Let’s just address the elephant in the room — October felt like one long Monday.
The kind that keeps resetting just when you think you’re about to catch your breath. Between family, work, and the never-ending news cycle, it seems like everyone’s shoulders got a little heavier.
And honestly? That’s why I’m grateful for National Stress Awareness Day, observed on the first Wednesday of November.
It’s not just another date on the calendar — it’s a quiet reminder to pause, breathe, and check in with yourself before life’s noise drowns you out.
Stress and the Body’s Unspoken Language
When we talk about stress, we usually describe what we do — “I’m tired,” “I just need a break,” “I’ll push through.”
But chronic stress is more than a feeling — it’s the body’s language for unhealed pain. It’s trauma whispering, “You’ve been holding too much for too long.”
Unresolved trauma doesn’t always look like tears or flashbacks. Sometimes it looks like irritability, silence, overworking, or shutting down. Sometimes it looks like perfectionism or being “the strong one” — especially for men who’ve been told their emotions are a sign of weakness.
That’s why it’s so fitting that November is also Men’s Mental Health Month.
Because the truth is, so many men are carrying their trauma in silence — not because they don’t feel it, but because they were never taught what to do with it.
The Stories Men Carry
As a therapist, I’ve sat with men who have never said out loud what happened to them — not the childhood pain, not the rejection, not the moment they realized they had to be “the protector” before they were even allowed to be a child. Many men experience trauma but are conditioned to function through it.
To show up, provide, fix, perform — even when they’re breaking inside. And when stress builds on top of that unspoken pain, the result isn’t just exhaustion — it’s a kind of quiet collapse. The kind that looks like anger or withdrawal, when underneath it all is grief.
We need to start normalizing conversations where men can say:
“I’m not okay.”
“I’m still healing.”
“I need help.”
Because asking for help isn’t a weakness — it’s survival.
Healing Is a Practice, Not a Moment
Whether you’re a man navigating your own story or someone supporting the men in your life, remember this: healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means feeling safely.
Here are a few small but powerful ways to start:
Pause before you power through. Take a breath before you say “I’m fine.”
Give language to your stress. “I’m overwhelmed,” “I’m tense,” “I feel disconnected.” Naming it lessens its control.
Find safe spaces. Therapy, support groups, faith-based communities, or even a trusted friend.
Release the myth of strength. Real strength is rooted in honesty, not endurance.
Moving Forward Together
At My Mental Health University™, this month is about reflection and reconnection — for everyone, but especially for the men who’ve been holding their pain in silence.
We’ll be continuing that conversation in our upcoming November training, which we’ve pushed back just slightly as we finalize the final modules and updates.
It will be live by November 15th, and I promise, it’s worth the wait.
This training focuses on helping communities — and the professionals who serve them — understand how stress, trauma, and culture intersect.
It’s about building healing spaces where both men and women can unlearn silence and rediscover their voice.
If October felt like one long Monday, let November be your permission to slow down and start again.
Healing isn’t loud. Sometimes it begins quietly — with a pause, a breath, and the courage to finally tell your story.
To help you along the way, My Mental Health University has a free worksheet for men. Access your worksheet below
You’re not alone in this. 💜
Olivia L. Baylor, LCPC, NCC
Founder, My Mental Health University™
www.mymhuniversity.com
